So this morning I got on my usual 6 train to 28th street and as I got on it was as it normally is, full! There was a man sitting in front of me who was um yeah, how do I say this delicately… very large and taking up much more room than the average person. He was also sound asleep with his head slumped over and his chubby little legs dangling off the seat. I believe it was 59th street where a number of people got of and freed up some space on the bench.
I sat down next to the sleeping weeble and began my normal staring into space (avoiding eye contact with the person directly across from me). Just then we stop at 51st and the conductor announces, “due to an incident at 14th street, the train will be delayed. Please be patient.” At that time weeble man growled and grunted out of his slumber and kind of looked around to see what was going on. I sat there waiting for the train to move again but realized that weebs was still grunting and moaning even after he was fully awake. It sounded like a low rumbling/growling, grunting type noise.
After about 3 minutes of this, the woman on the other side of me looks up from her book and smiled at me and then goes back to reading. She does this about three more times when I look at her, motion a thumb to weeby and say, “that’s not me, it’s Jabba the Hut over here!”. Keep in mind that I say this completey out loud and without embarrassment as the woman replies, “I thought that was your stomach”. If that had been my stomach I would have already been off the train and to the nearest public restroom!
Gee, usually the morning commute is so boring!
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